I have to apologize to whosoever might by my Valentine in 2016. Not just because you’ll be spending Valentine’s Day with me (so probably a romantic session of laser tag followed by a nice long walk by the library), but also because I will want to talk about one thing and one thing only: that Deadpool movie.

“Which Deadpool movie?” my unfortunate Valentine may ask.

“And put on some goddamn pants,” she would add.

Why, it will be the biggest thing on the silver screen in 2016. At that point, I would have watched it when it opened two days ago, and ten times more since then. I might have been giddy from Abrams’ Star Wars Episode 7 in 2015, but this one takes the chimichanga. “They announced it two years ago,” I tell my Valentine, as I grudgingly pulled on a pair of slacks, and the scene drifts away into a flashback.

It is 20th September 2014. 20th Century Fox made a huge announcement: they’re releasing a Deadpool movie.

Screen Shot 2014-09-23 at 3.20.56 PM

Cue rapturous applause and whoops and cheers and fuck-yeahs.

This was of course followed by the knowing chuckle.

Us Deadpool fans know what you did there, Fox. You see, after 2014’s Comic-Con, a rare test footage for a supposed Deadpool film ‘leaked’ to the Internet (I’ve attached the YouTube vid further below). Some of us know that it was made a few years back, when Ryan Reynolds expressed an interest in making a Deadpool movie after 2009’s X-Men Origins: Wolverine kinda made a huge messy chimichanga in their treatment of the anti-hero. Nevertheless, Ryan Reynolds did a rather good job in his portrayal of Wade Wilson (Deadpool’s real identity) for the first hour of the movie, before he became a cheesy overpowered, mouthless, red glowing eyes-having….something else.

3875359-maxresdefault
Pictured: something else

After that, the fear was that interest in Deadpool would wane. However, some rather strong performances in the comic book circuit by the Merc With A Mouth, with titles such as Deadpool: Wade Wilson’s War, Deadpool Killustrated, and his so-damn-fucking-hilarious appearances in the X-Force series causing ROFLs among comic book nerds ensured that the character’s following remained strong. Fox needed to see if support for Deadpool justifies bringing him to the big screen, so this ‘leaked’ test footage, timed so blatantly after Comic-Con, was a sneaky, hands-off, it-wasn’t-me means of gauging interest in the character.

The test footage was very well received, with the whole Internet ablaze with talk after it was put up. In it, Ryan Reynolds provided voice and motion capture, but we finally see Deadpool in his trademark red-and-black spandex and pulling out from hammerspace – of all things – a doodle in the middle of a highway fight. This was closer to the Deadpool that us fans know and love and eat chimichangas to while reading his comics.

What we know of the movie so far is that Tim Miller, who was visual effects director for the first two X-Men and The Night At The Museum, will be director. The Deadpool movie will be his directorial debut.

The rumour mill says that Ryan Reynolds will reprise his role as Wade Wilson/Deadpool, and as long as the screenwriters for The Green Lantern aren’t involved, I say it’d be fantastic casting. There’s no word as to whether creator Rob Liefied will be involved as a writer or producer.

My only gripe is the same gripe I have with this really stupid distribution of film rights among the Marvel properties – a result of business decisions that had no consideration for fandom. The rights to Deadpool, along with Spiderman, Fantastic Four and the X-Men, are owned by 20th Century Fox, so if you want to see Deadpool piss the fuck out of the Avengers (or charge ten years’ supply of Mexican food to Tony Stark’s credit card for services rendered), you’ll have to wait until 20th Century Fox gives up their rights to these characters, or some strange, heartwarming, humanitarian agreement is brokered between them and Marvel Studios.

Of course, that’s not gonna stop me from watching this movie in 2016. And to spoil some poor girl’s Valentine’s Day by going on and on (I’m actually craving chimichangas) and on and on and on (mmmm chimichangas) and on and on about it. Chimichanga anyone?

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